Tuesday, 6 February 2018

Lifestyle: The Art of Unbusy


In our culture it seems like being constantly busy is a badge of honour. Particularly if it makes you ill or loses you sleep - as long as you soldier on anyway!
For some people, let's say the extroverts of this world, that sort of lifestyle can actually be energising.
For me (an introvert with a dash of extroversion), that is not living, it’s just surviving. It's a way of life that involves collecting lots of experiences but not really being present for any of them.

A few years ago, I remember regularly looking at my diary and seeing that for the following 2 weeks, every single second of my time was accounted for.

I’d just be running from one thing to the next. It made me feel like I was on fast forward, that my life was just speeding past in a blur. Sure I was doing a lot, but I wasn’t really enjoying any of it. I was just checking things off a mental to do list; then always looking ahead to the next thing, and the thing after that, wishing some free time would appear somewhere.

In the end, it was getting ill that finally made me slow down and take another look at how I was choosing to organise my life.
All of a sudden, I didn't have the same capacity for busyness that I'd had before, and I didn't want it either.

Then came the slightly uncomfortable working out of a new way to plan my time. Not just saying yes to things, but taking a moment to think through each week and the allotted amount of energy that I would have. This meant working out who and what were my priorities. Once I'd done this, I could give more time to those people and things, and then fit everything else in as and when.

If I look at my diary and see that I'm busy for more than 3 nights a week, I get this anxious feeling in the pit of my stomach. To be honest, my preference would definitely be less than 3! 
As an introvert, evenings are my time to recharge, so that I can then go into the next working day as the best version of myself. Because I know this about myself, I know that I don't need to feel bad about it. There are times when I start to make comparisons with people who have a bigger capacity for busyness than I do, but I try to just shrug it off and not let it make me feel bad.

We're all different and that's ok.
The sooner we take an honest look at ourselves, the sooner we can learn to love and accept ourselves as we are. No apologies needed.

And sure, busier weeks will come along. But I'm careful to plan in some downtime too; to manage the balance as best as I can.

I think unbusyness is an art. To keep the balance between self-care but also looking outwards to the people and world around us. To think about how best to love and bless others, out of a healthy and well-rested place.

How do you find this? Are you someone who gets joy out of busyness? Or someone who, like me, needs the regular recharging time too?

1 comment:

  1. I so agree with you! As a medical student, this glorification of being constantly busy (never sleeping, always sick, not having time to exercise or eat well) is really ridiculous! People love to talk about how busy they are (I only slept for 2 hours last night because I had so much work plus I’m involved in 99 student societies!) and expect to get praised for it. It’s really silly! I think it’s soooo important to plan in some downtime. For me, that means having a relaxing morning and evening routine on either side of a busy day - and prioritizing a healthy lifestyle where I sleep enough, eat well, and exercise.

    ReplyDelete